King Theoden Experience

Please watch this video clip before reading this post. It will make much more sense after you've seen it. I can wait while you watch.:)

Okay, finished? Good.

A few days ago I was King Theoden. King Theoden was possessed by the spirit of a wizard named Saruman. While under his possession King Theoden sat back and grew old and blind to what was happening to his kingdom. His people were being massacred by the enemy; his nephew was driven from the land; and his own son had been killed, yet the king listened to the spirit controlling him. Once he was freed by Gandalf, the blindness disappeared and the dying old man returned to a healthy king. All of that was good, but King Theoden had to come to grip with what had happened in the meantime, the destruction that his actions or lack of actions caused. He had to grieve his only son and realize that his spiritual imprisonment caused it.

I was being controlled by a spirit as well. It was the spirit of jealousy. I was blinded to the truth in my relationships, I felt old and sick, and I had no idea that it was killing my relationship with two very precious friends. Unlike Theoden, a good wizard didn't come and drive the spirit out of me by force. By the Holy Spirit did break through all the noise of that spirit and reveal it to me. Then He told me to take authority over it. I could have been like Gandalf and tried to do it in my own strength. I know that I do not have the power to drive out spirits, except in the Name of Jesus. It is sort of like the part of the scene when Gandalf reveals that he is a white wizard, which is the most powerful one. I went from just plain old my strength to His by commanding the spirit to leave in the Name of Jesus. The spirit didn't like it and tried to hang on, but it couldn't when the Name of Jesus was spoken. It had to flea.

Once the spirit of jealousy was gone I had my eyes open to what had been happening. What I saw broke my heart. I saw the truth and it grieved me. I had to make apologizes and I had to hear the hurt that I caused one friend in particular. It hurt, but I needed to hear and know the truth. I thank God that unlike Theoden's son, my friendships are not dead. I had to grieve the pain caused and the damage done to the friendships, but God can and is restoring our relationships.

This was not an easy post to write. I felt I needed to write about this, but I wanted to do it in a way that honored my friends. I didn't want it to cause anymore pain. It was also unpleasant because admitting something like this is not comfortable. But the Lord gave me a verse a little while ago, and I have blogged about it before. Isaiah 61:3 "To anoint unto them that mourn in Zion, to give unto them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness, that they may be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord, that He might be glorified." The last part is the key for me and in this situation, "that He might be glorified". I knew I had to share this with you, because I believe that God will be glorified from this.

I do ask for your prayers. It is hard to not remember past hurts that I caused, but I need to learn from it and move forward. That is hard, because satan wants me to focus on it and be destroyed by that. It is also hard because I am a processor and I am replaying the scenes over and over in my mind. But God wants me to grow in Him and to let Him heal the pain caused. He wants me to focus on Him and the relationships that He is restoring. He wants me to learn from the past and focus on the now and making sure that I am walking in Him.

Thank you for reading this post. I hope that in some way it was able to speak Truth to you. I hope that you will pray for me and my friends. I believe that God will be glorified! Amen!

Not Against Flesh and Blood

I believe that God lines things up, brings things in bunches, so that I can realize that it's really from Him. I have been reading a fiction book about spiritual warfare. I know there are some who don't believe that it is as powerful and true as I do. All I can say is once you have experienced it for yourself you can no longer deny it is real. And if you haven't experienced it for yourself you might need to be concerned that satan doesn't consider you enough of a threat to bother attacking you.

Anyway, back to the point. I have been reading this book, praying more intensely for my students, and had some ask me about some books that were "spiritual". See, He brings it in bunches like I said. Well, the book I'm reading has reminded me that I do not fight against flesh and blood although it sure feels like it at times. Ephesians 6:12 says "For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places." ESV

There are so many "christians" who don't believe in evil or hell or demons. The Bible clearly says that there are and that we are wrestling with them! That "we" in the verse is Christians. We tend to think once we are saved satan can't mess with us. Jesus has defeated him so I don't need to worry about him. Jesus did defeat him, but until the end of this world he is going to keep trying to take people down with him. Yes, you are wrestling against him!

So this week I went to work for three days due to the killer cold keeping me out for two. During those three days I have prayed in my room before the kids came in and commanded certain spirits that they have no authority in my room, in the name of Jesus. Well, they weren't happy about it and it was three rough days. I even had a serious issue of girl drama and I haven't had any of that all year! Some demons are wrestling back. I can't give up though and Monday I will enter my room and pray again. I will continue to fight the enemy on the spiritual level.

I looked into the "spiritual" books shared with me and saw false religion all over it. The Bible tells us that there will be people who come along and pervert the Gospel. People says things that sound  right, smart, logical. Yet these people are leading others away from the Truth. The book of Jude is just one place you can read about these people. We have to be so very careful of what we expose ourselves to. The thing that really bothered me about these books, besides the attempt to take people away from the Truth, was that they are written for hurting people. The very people who satan has messed with and caused them pain and know he is trying to "heal" them. He can't heal anyone. The only one who can bring healing, and no his name is not time, is God. He is the one who heals the brokenhearted. See Psalm 34:18 and Psalm 147:3 and Isaiah 61:1 and there are more verses that speak of His healing.

The real reason I sat down to write this post was this revelation God gave me. Christians think we can't be hurt by satan.We think we can't be deceived by him. We think of him as defeated and a joke. He likes that, no he loves that. Because it allows him to freely reek havoc amongst us. God showed me that even the closest ones to Him can be deceived.

Eve walked and talked with God on a daily basis. She saw God! She actually saw Him and talked to Him! You can't get much closer to Him than Adam and Eve were. She heard Him say, "And the Lord God commanded the man, saying, 'You may surely eat of every tree of the garden,  but of the tree of the knowledge of good and evil you shall not eat, for in the day that you eat of it you shall surely die.'" Genesis 2:16 ESV.

Satan shows up one chapter later with, "He said to the woman, "Did God actually say, ‘You shall not eat of any tree in the garden’?”  And the woman said to the serpent, “We may eat of the fruit of the trees in the garden, but God said, ‘You shall not eat of the fruit of the tree that is in the midst of the garden, neither shall you touch it, lest you die.’” But the serpent said to the woman, “You will not surely die. For God knows that when you eat of it your eyes will be opened, and you will be like God, knowing good and evil.'” Genesis 3:1-5 ESV.

Do you see it? Eve heard God say you can't eat of the tree, not that you can't touch it. Do you see that satan doesn't correct her mistake, he compounds it by telling her that she won't die. She walked and talked with God and even she misquoted Him and even she believed the lies of satan. We Christians misquote the Scriptures all the time! Why do you think there is so much division and pointing-down-your finger going on in the church? Because we misquote God and satan jumps on it. He runs with it. He causes death from it.

We need to stop putting our heads in the sand and acting like satan isn't at work in our world, in our churches, and even in our lives. Not that we can start claiming "the devil made me do it" either, but we need to bury our head in His Word and check. We need to check to see if what our pastors are preaching is Truth or does it just sound good or go along with our denominational thinking. We need to check out organizations that are promising healing and see if they line up with the Word. We need to check what we say and what we believe and see if it actually lines up with the Word of God. We need to realize that yes, people are fleshy and act out of their own desires, wants, and selfishness, but they also are being used by satan. Anything, a-n-y-t-h-i-n-g, that doesn't line up with the Word of God that we say or do can and will be used by satan to cause division, strife, fear, hurt, destruction, shame, loathing, anger, and so on an so one, ultimately leading to death.

The good news is the Good News! We have the Word of God that we can turn to, stand on, and proclaim to help defeat the work of satan. We can pray and it has great power. James 5:16b tells us "The prayer of a righteous person has great power as it is working." ESV. We can speak against the enemy in the name of Jesus and the enemy will flee, it may take time but it will happen. (Acts 16:18)

Not sure how to close this. Someone asked what I did instead of attending formal church and I told her spend time with Jesus. This is what happens when I do. He speaks to me! :)

Bad Dreams

When I was a little girl I used to have terrible dreams. I can still remember some of those dreams, but what I remember the most is lying in bed after one of these dreams. I can still see myself laying in my canopy bed, curled up with the covers pulled up tight around my chin. I would look out the window in my bedroom and hope the sun would be coming up soon. And I would be thinking, actually saying out loud good things. I had once been to Disney World so I used to say "Mickey Mouse" out loud. Thinking about Mickey Mouse made me think on good things and at times would help chase the bad dreams away.

As I got older those bad dreams were joined by night terror. If you have never had night terror then you have no idea how truly terrifying it can be. My night terror was of various things including creepy crawling animals, bugs, spiders, and the worst would be that someone was watching me sleep. One of the worst things about night terror is I was never completely asleep when it happened. Being partially awake made everything seem so much more real, so much more frightening.

Last night I had a terrible dream. One in which I was being chased and people were trying to catch me because they wanted to hurt me. They couldn't catch me and that made them angry so instead of planning to just hurt me they planned to kill me. I kept running, crying, and trying to find the way out of the maze of stuff I was running through. I woke up and my heart was literally pounding in my chest. I was terrified, but thankful to be awake. I reverted back to that little girl and pulled the covers up to my chin and started to say good things. The difference is I don't say "Mickey Mouse" anymore, although I still really like Mickey. Now I say a name that really has power. I say "Jesus". Over and over again I say His name until I fall back to sleep.

I wish I never have to have bad dreams or night terror, but when I do, when the danger seems so real, I know the one thing that brings true peace and rest. I know and say the name "Jesus".