To give up or not to give up? That is the question that I ask of me.
Sometimes giving up is good. Sometimes giving up is exactly what God is asking me to do. Sometimes giving up is bad. Sometimes God wants me to preserve and not give up. So when do I know which one is which?
I have wavered back and forth between both. One day I may be sure that I need to keep praying, keep believing and the next day all I want to do is give up. Sometimes this is based on events that encourage or discourage me. Sometimes it is based solely on my emotions. Sometimes it is based on misunderstanding or misperception. I just feel confused about what I should do.
I pray. I have prayed about this over and over again for years. I can't believe sometimes that it has been years. I never thought I could wait as long as I have. I can think back and remember that there was no way I could wait for months, let alone years. I have been waiting years now.
I am not the only person who struggles with this. I am not the only one struggling with waiting. I am not the only person who struggles with whether or not I should keep asking, seeking, and knocking. I know I'm not the only one, but sometimes it sure feels like I am.
So, I need to know which I need to do. I need to know whether I keep keeping on or throw my hands up and move in another direction. I know that the only one who can answer this for me is God, but I do wonder if others who are waiting, or have waited, have any words of wisdom that you will share. It would help me to know there are others and I'm not in this waiting game alone.