Well, this is the death phase so pain comes with the territory. I could sum up the whole chapter with this, "that's the secret of pressing through the pain. Really, it's the secret of pressing through all of this life. Learning to depend on God, asking for His provision, and then remembering to look for His ready answers." Lysa.
Going through the pain of a death of anything is hard, it's overwhelming. Thinking about focusing on God when the pain is so raw seems impossible. I know when I am in pain it is easy focus on the pain and the thing that caused me pain. Last week I was in pain. I felt like my heart had stopped and I was overwhelmed by feelings that I didn't think I would have. Honestly, I had no thoughts. I felt blank, numb, and in pain.
I could have stayed there. I could have blamed the pain on someone else or my own lack, but I didn't want to. I wanted to find God. I wanted to pour out the pain to Him and try to see what the purpose of the pain was. If nothing else the pain drove me to God. I know He has a plan. I know He is at work.
Lysa writes, " God is near. He's drawing me close, teaching me lessons I can't learn any other way, revealing more of His character, allowing me to experience Him in even more amazing ways." That is what I want! I want to be confident that even through the pain He is near. I want to learn the lessons He has for me, but most importantly I want Him. I want to know Him! I guess that is the point of it all, Him!